what is this love which goes from bad to worse

.
.
.
Riding my aunt's bike down the Broadway bridge last night after they'd turned on all the lights in the bar and I'd realized that no one was as familiar as I'd assumed and I left - I felt invisible and misplaced, off-centered
All in black and without lights or helmet
I ran red lights and avoided looking in on the drivers beside me

The end of an almost-date and I was mostly just missing another...
pleased to be going home alone and to be granted this moment of quiet, mourning a life I could have if I lived in this city again.


.
.
.



My brother is packing to go camping for a night all alone, and I'm shocked that he is suddenly so old and capable
We remember when as a toddler he woke up from his nap under the trees on the beach, saw us swimming and he walked right into the lake, fearless and so trusting

the land around is flat flat flat

Hey guys, guess what?

If you google my real name it will come up with a list of "celebrities" expected to attend Toronto Film Festival.
ahahahaahhhhhhhhhhaaa

Me, then Michael Cera. (babe)

Busy busy. Party party.

Too much to do and a lot of wasted time... I almost went swimming in the lake today but then it started thunderstorming.

There's nothing to eat in Saskatchewan except wheat. Silly Bread Basket.

I'm not dead

No sir.

Just Saskatooning. And also this household is not conducive to me having time alone with the computer. And also I forgot the cord that attaches my camera to the comp for uploading.. sigh.

I have been being very very social. I have been seeing lots of lovelies and partying down. I have been hanging with my mum way too much.
I read a book cover-to-cover on the beach yesterday but didn't go swimming. I drive around in my mum's new old car. I saw some excellent music at the We Are Many festival. I try to scope babes but there are no eligible bachelors in Saskatoon. And especially none that I haven't already macked on.

Haha macked on.

Haven't seen enough extended family but I'm pretty sure that that will be remedied in two days when we all see each other way too much and want to barf on each other's faces. Yum!

I watched Squid and the Whale and didn't like it. Holy unlikeable characters. Some lines were pretty awesome though.
"I wish you had less freckles on your face", etc.

Miss Toronto. Miss certain babes - dudes and ladies both. For sure.
Miss my apartment even though it certainly did no get cleaned properly before I left.

Here there are hundreds of cats, thousands of cats, millions and billions and trillions of cats.

And they all like to sleep in my bed. Smiling emoticon.

some funny videos

This video is really quite funny.

See more funny videos at Funny or Die

And this video I always try to tell people about but do a poor job out it.. so just watch it your own damn self.

See more Zach Galifianakis videos at Funny or Die

brunch two days in a row!

Aunties and Uncles is smarter than me. Why? Because they thought of apple crisp pancakes and I did not.
You know what else would be good? Pear crisp pancakes.

Oh Wheat!

Wheat has been creeping back into my life, mostly in beer format, but also in fake meats and in that bag of perogies I bought..
I think that's why I'm feeling out of it again.

Hmmmmm.

I'm packed.. mostly. And tired. And the house is still dirty but not terribly messy. I did the dishes at least leave me alone.

I always choose flights that are stupidly early. I don't know why. Because I'm stupid, I bet.
But that means I'll have all day to party in Saskatoon tomorrow!
Even if I'm exhausted while doing it...



I'm going to continue creeping people's facebook profiles to make lolcats. Because I'm that kind of a girl.

implied

I know I know I know

I have way too many things to edit. I should refuse myself the right to take anymore pictures until I've dealt with the ones I have already.

Do a nude photoshoot?!?


.





I haven't got clearance on any others of the photos that aren't of me. But I'm thinking some that are just implied nudity should be alright for postage.
Like this one, which I think is lovely.





I'm hoping that when I become famous the NSFW ones get stolen and then they threaten to release them to the internets because I wouldn't care. I'd just think it's funny. Luckily I'm not considering a career in politics. or Catholicism.

separate the whites from the colours

It's days like these where I can't believe the underuse, in my teens, of our washer and dryer. What I would do to have a laundry system stationed across the hall from me now.
What I would do for handy soap, right beside. For dryer sheets readily available.

But I holed up and messed up. I waded through the piles of clothes and dishes and magazines and locked my door in the night even though my mother told me not to (what if there's a fire and we need to rescue you?).

I postered all my walls with dreamboats. I postered the ceilings with larger-than-life cute-boy smiles. Once I woke to find that my favourite poster had fallen onto my face and it was almost as if he and I were sleeping together!
It must have meant something...

Days like these I am tugging sacks of sheets and towels and too many clothes up and down my block to the laundrymat and still thinking of dreamboats, still thinking if I wake up beside him it must mean something. Still messing things up and holing up to sulk.
But I am also getting to be the person that teenaged me dreamt of.
Getting closer and closer still.
Miles to go, etc

I kind of want those cats.

The best part about coming home drunk last night was when my friend and I stopped in front of her house to pet the two cats that have been chilling on her porch lately and then this guy comes out of the basement next door carrying his laundry and so we obviously ask him if these are his cats, which they are not.. but the point is: Who does their laundry at 2:30 a.m.?
And was he a babe?

Goddamn my babedar is off. I have no idea.

The other good thing was how I talked to AndrewKeith until 4 a.m. or some nonsense and I don't really remember what we talked about. I can say his full name on here because he always mentions me by name on his diary. So fair's fair.
I like that dude. He's pretty nutso.

Sneaky Dee's late night with my neighbour because I wanted BEER. And nachos. Obviously. It was pretty fun, if you like that sort of thing. We drank too much though. But then you can talk about everything everything.

I still feel a bit like hibernating. But there's no time for that sort of thing. Too much to do.

Can I just tell you about how little I want to go back to Skydome tonight?
It's very very little.

Luckily it's mere days away until my triumphant return to Saskatoon.
I'm going to go to the lake! And hold a baby!

I have to pick up my bike on the way to work. Hopefully it's still where I left it last week. I've felt kind of stranded without it.

I wish I could just stay home all day again today and work on that dress. I really want it to be as beautiful as it is in my head. Hopefully!
I'm going to try and finish all three maxi-dresses before home-time.
The word maxi-dress is annoying. And it makes dudes uncomfortable, I think.

Pretty sure I'm kind of depressed. But for no good reason and it's annoying me. Which doesn't help things.

Whilst preparing for the orgy scene onset last week I declared "If I have to wear these nudie-things then I'm going to be wearing this robe underneath!"

Yeah, I cropped my face out of the picture because it is honestly one of the worst things I've seen.

It kind of blows my mind how I never get to wear make-up for shoots. I mean, shouldn't I get the star treatment at all times?
Oh right, I'm naturally beautiful. I keep forgetting.

voldy mort voldy mort ooo vordy voldy voldy VOLDEMORT!

Hey Meredith, how's your writing going?
Oh it's in the shitter, pretty much!

I have a migraine right now. Which has dissipated a bit but I still am lacking in motor control and am feeling a bit nauseous.
Sounds about the right time to start writing again.

I made a dress today. It needs a tie around the middle but besides that it is done, I think. It's very very pretty fabric (from Value Village). I bought three big pieces of fabric from VV, I kind of feel like they must have all come from one home because they were all similar (the same?) sizes. One is turquoise sari fabri though and one is brownish pretty print and this one is sort of shiny plaid with a sparkly thread through it. Oh god I'm getting as bad as Spenny at describing things!

Oh yeah, my VV trip was very fruitful and productive. Upon reaching the cashier I realized I had VV coupons - one for every month in my wallet. But then I saw that the one for August was 'spend $100 or more and get 50% off everything' and I was all "who would spend a HUNDRED dollars??" but then my friend realized we were both at about $35 each so we ran around and picked out more stuff and ended up spending about the $35 we were planning on, but got twice as much stuff!!! Hurrah.
I also got a pretty table cloth and a yoga mat and some glassware and a simple brown leather purse (fashion pick for fall). And a red dress that didn't look like much on the rack but when it's put on my rack, it looks pretty hot. And it's very comfortable.

Started another dress after starting this post... it's gonna be sweet. If it ends well...
Now I'm on the phone and I have to publish this. Hurrah!!!

beat that

You know what?
They sell pregnancy tests at Dollarama!
At that price I can afford to take one every month.

One night at the motel during shooting we stayed up way too late watching funny cat and dog videos and scrolling through page after page of icanhascheezburger.com. It was pretty silly.
but I've been laughing about this video for the past few days:


I've uploaded most of the pictures from set. I'll be getting to a blog about that soon. Just like I'll be getting to blogging about the past two cottage trips. Goddammit. Too much to do.

And I totally wasted yesterday in the best way. I didn't leave my house I just watched TV and movies all day.
I watched:
Penelope -
Everything I expected and more. Very nice, very enjoyable. All of the actors were pretty fantastic. James McAvoy is a babe. Catherine O'Hara is perfect. And Reese Witherspoon is unexpectedly enjoyable. I still love Christina Ricci's voice. It reminds me of grade 8. Anyone remember Gold Diggers: Secret of Bear Mountain? That was a gooder.
August Rush -
Fine. I bawled all the way through it. Whatever. It's great. Jonathan Rhys Myers is dreamy. That kid is great. The extreme musical parts were hard to buy, but I did my best. I love a good happy ending more than most things in life.
Baby Mama -
This is much better, more human and warm than the poster would suggest. It's really quite nice and has a oddly great cast. And a perfect ending. Tina Fey is great. I want to be Amy Pohler someday. She has my dream life right now.

Except I also have my dream life right now.



Watching web videos can take up all of your time if you're not careful.
But this one is pretty good.

Worth watching until the end.

Hey guys, I'm going home on Friday! And I just had a look at the line-up for the We Are Many Festival and it looks really really fun. Pretty much every one of my favourite Saskatooners are playing as well as one of my Toronto BFFs as well as the Weakerthans, Fred Penner, and Joel Plaskett!
I'm very excited for just hanging out in the park all weekend and seeing my buds!

And I have little to do before then. Work a couple of shifts, clean the house, buy some gifts.. and party. I suppose. If I have to.

exhausted

I went to sleep at around 1:30 a.m. last night and slept pretty much right through until 2 p.m. this afternoon.
Something tells me that I was tired.

Been onset for the past few days!!! Yes, I know that you know that already. But still!
Super fun party time. Realized it's the first feature set I've been on. And the first set where there was a solid group of 20-somethings to bond with. I kind of wish I hadn't liked everyone so much.. it was really hard to leave yesterday.
Especially knowing that some of them get to hang next week without me. Sigh.

It was awesome working with my friend, which was great considering my slight worry about it. But I think I love her even more after this. Which is great.

And I'm pretty heart-broken to not get to spend mass amounts of time with the rest of the cast anymore. Even the crew were neat-o. Loved especially the hair and make-up and the wardrobe people. And the AD who shared his booze, of course.

I was the first one wrapped yesterday and it was my final day on set and they called me down to the set for a minute and then everyone came out and they said "That's a picture wrap on Meredith" and then everyone clapped and I almost cried. And then everyone was all "we'll miss you" and other gay junk like that just to make me feel sadder and make it harder for me not to cry.
Sigh.
Here's the cast waving good-bye to me


Aw man guys. So ready to be a working actor. All The damn time.

Gotta go for lunch with some peeps. And then go to Value Village maybe!
Because I got my tax return. And want to buy something pretty to wear for when I come home on friday(!!!). So obviously Value Village is the best choice.

all I have to say about this morning is:

thanks to god for two alarm clocks and my drunken foresight to set them.


Shuttle to set leaves in half an hour. Gotta pack!

Extreme party town day yesterday where I left my house at 1 and got home at 2ish.. in the morning.

SANGRIA SANGRIA SANGRIA and then some more sangria. And then some wine.

Mother is proud of me right now, I can tell.

And that's not even getting into the nude photoshoot we did last night. Pretty fun times, gotta say. I'm hoping these pictures come out just when I'm getting pretty famous...

Anyhow, I'm going to be away (on set!!) until Friday night it looks like, so if there's any chance of finding some internet, you hear from me. Otherwise, not at all. But I'll miss you!

I can make your hand disappear!

Dreamt of going home and falling back in love with my mentally ill ex-boyfriend. In a hyper-realistic way. Dealing with people's stigma about it, their complete awfulness about it, dealing with him and his family, and with his not making any sense but with still loving him. Woke up feeling thankful that wasn't the case. But still.
Thanks again, Barbara Gowdy.


I'm not actually very good at talking about other people's problems. I tell people what to do too often and I don't have enough of a filter. Between what I think and what actually needs to be said.
I also always think I'm right.
Oh, who doesn't


Booked my trip home to Saskatoon. Luckily, since it's less than two weeks away. Craaaazy. I'm not even home sick yet. This is awesome.
August 22nd to Sept. 2nd party time.
Just enough to to We-Are-Many-fest, lake, party, party, bond, party, drink tea, then leave.
Back here in time to figure out what the hell I'm going to wear to go hang out at film fest.
I want to make some dresses. We'll see if that actually happens (nope).



OMG got my mum the best birthday present today. I wish that she didn't read this so that I could post it for you. It's ever-so-pretty and yet completely useful. Which is exactly what my mother is about.
Maybe I'll just keep it. I wish I could justify buying one for myself.
Actually... maybe I can. After I get real paid at least.
I really don't know why I like it so much, but I do. And I'm trying to think who else I know could use one. Pretty much every fancy lady. Haha that gave you a wrong idea of what it is.
I've also built it up now! Now no matter what it is it won't measure up to mother's expectations! perfect!
Shit, I went to upload pictures of it to post to my other journal that no one reads but then I realized that even if I set it to private on my flickr my mother would still see it because I think she's still logged into my flickr as me. Hell. Good thing I remembered that.
Got the internet is a complicated landscape.

I'm trying to clear out the junk from my home. I'm trying to not buy useless shit anymore. And especially trying to get rid of anything junky/plastic. I threw out my crappy dish rack because it was ugly. Now I don't have one and that's for the best. Just my favourite red tray and a pretty tea towel. And I threw out the plastic juice jug and bought a glass one. Need more glass containers. Red glass especially I want.
I also need a pretty kettle (red or maybe green) and some cast-iron frying pans (I'm tired of eating teflon!) and I need a pretty pot to keep my wooden spoons and things in.
Housewares are pretty much the grown-up equivalent of school supplies.

Did some laundry today! Now if only I would get around to putting it away and cleaning things up around here...

I went to the cheese store that's less than two blocks from my house for the first time today. I'm pretty sure the brie I got sold is not good. Like verging on mouldy. Gross. I haven't tried it yet. But I did eat close to a log of goat's cheese. And it was good.

Downloading a shit-load of Patsy Cline. That sounds good to clean to. We'll see.

Damn I wish Jonathan-Cat hadn't left. There's nothing lonely than apartment freshly empty of kitten.


this is my neighbour's cat. to make me feel a bit better. click on the photos to see all of it. yes.

Dear Barbara Gowdy,

your book, The Romantic, did not make me feel better. This true and ultimate be-all-and-end-all love with a beautiful young man who is mentally unstable and alcoholic did not end well. And you forgot to write the epilogue where the protagonist goes on to find happiness with a stable, well-adjusted gentleman and lives happily ever after. And you forgot to say that even though her heart was broken a couple of times over by that young man, and even though he really was beautiful and worthwhile and important, that she is still good at loving and can move on. And you forgot to say that she is able to find greater fulfillment and joy later on.
I guess I'll just write that in for you.

Beautiful novel though.

love,
Meredith R. Mistletoe

mysterious shoppers

hey yourself there lil guy.

oh yeah yesterday bff and i had brunches at aunties and uncles restaurant in the heart of beautiful downtown toronto.
I saw Matt Murphy of Flashing Lights and I like Flashing Lights a lot because the first (only, I guess. that's funny that I wouldn't first think 'only') time I made out with one certain babe who fully broke my heart right before I moved here from Saskatoon years ago, he was wearing a Flashing Lights t-shirt and I made out with him in his room for hours and traced the band's name, the lettering on his chest and dreaded how I had to leave him. And dreaded that even if I wasn't leaving, he still wouldn't be with me proper.
This story would be sadder if that dude wasn't still one of my favourite people and friends. And if Flashing Lights weren't a rad band.

Geezus, Aunties, could you be more delicious?

I brought a slew of sunglasses for Spenny to try on and to keep whichever ones she'd like because she's the bff. And when people care about each other, they can give each other things. Like, for instance, backpacks. Or even luggage.

You didn't know I collect sunglasses? Well, I do. Maybe because for years I couldn't find any to suit my tiny face. Now I have way, way too many. And I constantly buy more. Stupid Value Village with your $1 glasses. And stupid Kensington, with your $5 bargains.


These are rad. I have yet to find someone who they suit though..


I still have no idea why I bought these. I've never worn them.


She took these ones, which I thought she might, and these next ones, which I actually bought specially in case she wanted them..


It's a mystery to both of us why she kept putting her hands up like that for the photos.

One man at my work calls mystery shoppers "mysterious shoppers" and I can't help but picture them all as femme fatales with red lipstick and head scarves wrapped to almost cover their faces, or wide-brimmed hats or a sheet of black hair covering their eyes..
She was so mysterious...
she made me lose my job
but I'd still follow her anywhere...

Speaking of mysterious!


Who the hell sent me this? From Saskatoon. With the inital 'C' (possible 'L'?)?
Who did it!!!
It's kind of creepy a little bit.

JTT-TTC caught a mouse! And left it (dead) on the carpet for me to come home to. Hurrah! Good work, little guy.
I keep trying to make Jonathan do things that would be suitable for LOLcat-ing but he's just so sweet and deadpan, it's pretty disappointing.
I have a sneaking suspicion that Jonathan is the best cat ever.
Not that I don't love Rerun and Adventure Cat above all else. And maybe even Cactus and Pansy too.. but they are all quite flawed of cats. Even Adventure is wild beyond her means...
Whereas Jonathan is pretty much perfect.

His main flaw is that he poos when he gets scared.
But then, who doesn't??

That reminds me, I misssss dollface. Holy come home soon already. Jeeeezus.
By which I mean, Happy Marriage, Dollface Sister!!!

sighs

I worked at skydome all day and now I have to go work at the theatre centre all night... yay hooray except at least I had a nap this afternoon and also read my book while it rained, with jonathan-cat tangling himself up in my ankles and thumping his tail madly that I would not give the end of the bed up for him to have as his own.

Hey guys, look who came for a visit!!

That's right! It's Jonathan Tip Top Taylor Thomas Chirovsky. Talk about professional dreamboats.

Temp-Cat left this week. I don't know if I mentioned. I had to sit and have a mini-cry about it. I liked her a lot. Sigh.
But JTT-TTC is here to play!
Too bad I'm working all weekend and won't be chilling out with him too much.

Yeah went to meet my friend for her birthday. And she was actually with two of her friends that I know. So it was fun times. Her one friend is pretty much my EXACT body double. Like seriously weirdly similar bodies. I bet I could get into bed in the dark with her boyfriend and he would not know the difference. Actually he probably would because I'm so silky smooth... jk i'm scaly like a reptile. yum.

So I had a couple of glasses of wine with them (shotgunned in about 15 minutes) and then they all wienered out and went home to bed. So I was feeling particularly self-indulgent and sneaky and self-sabotaging so I went to Tim Hortons and ordered EVERYTHING in sight. Then I went home and ate it.
And giggled the entire time.
So pleased with myself for being such a tiny piglet.
I think I'm so funny sometimes.
Then today at brunch after we ate our omelettes my bff and I definitely ordered waffles for desert. Brilliant.
I'm in a super ridiculous good mood today though. Bordering on hysteria, maybe. BUT STILL.

Guess what? Jonathan doesn't like when you put a fancy scarf on him!


And I don't like it when I have to be workin all the time...

But I did fix my dye job and I didn't even eff it up this time around:

it's only almost midnight

Man, I was so sure that I would get around to posting about one or the other of my cottage vacations today. And I sure did not. Ohhhh well. Soonskies.

The wardrobe team yesterday was so ridiculously cute. I want both those dudes to move in with me. Except the make-up artist was telling us about how one of them, A, makes his boyfriend sleep closer to the door so that when the zombies come then they'll eat him first and give A time to get away!
He calls it his Early Warning System!
Later I was trying to remember what he called it and I asked him and he said "oh,you mean EWS?"
ahahahahha

The make-up artist is very nice too. She let us hang out in her trailer and talk to her while she worked. And let us look through her huge binder of Manson info and pictures. And told us set horror stories and stuff.
Sets that are filled with good people are one of the best things ever.
Makes everything so fun.

I want to go set again! Next week feels far away and I'm jealous of them all having fun without me. Not to mention them making all the bills.

I did alright at the skydome tonight... not comparatively, of course, but still.

Now I have to go to my friend's birthday! But we have little to no friends in common (despite knowing each other for 20 years) so I'm a little hesitant. Except she does tend to surround herself with rattitude.. should be good.
I wish I wasn't weirdly shy/awkward.
Working on it.

i wish i'd stolen more food from set

Great time on set today!!! Yay funtime sets where I have no real responsibilities or stress and everyone is super nice. And we totally went into overtime and that means they have to give me the dollar dollar bills.

I totally love this one girl the cast. I was exclaiming to my mother about her and I sounded like I was trying to date her. And I am a little bit. I want her to be my friend. I'm going to woo her. She's got the best smile-eyes and I find her really funny but also rewarding to be funny around. Sigh.

Also, it wasn't weird shooting with my friend. Not after we arranged that I would never look her directly in the eyes (I mean, she's the lead, so... it's only fair...)

I'm hoping they put us all up in a motel while we're shooting out of the city next week... then we'll all party down together! Oh fun times!!!


Random meeting up with friends last night brought two of the tallest guys I know into one room (squirrley's) and as they met I thought "they're totally going to end up talking about how tall they are"..
Turns out they've both recently traveled to Shaghai and both experienced a surprisingly amount of people staring, pointing, and full-out yelling at them about how tall they are.
One dude said about how they this specific phrase in Mandarin that means "EXTREME FEET HIGH!!!"
Except he didn't actually say that he said "extremely high!" but I thought he'd said extreme feet high and I thought that was the funniest thing of my entire life.
Immeasurable feet high!
Too many meters tall!
Much too high to be able to even guesstimate!!!

That would be awesome.

This has lead me to engrish.com
and more specifically to this picture there:


Please.

Last night at work I worked with a very lovely girl who is not always the most well-spoken and she informed me that:
"math is not for my brain, my brain is just not made for math. I'm more into liter-er-ature, you know - books?"

Lordy dudes, apparently the Backstreet Boys were at the dome today and I missed them!
I want my picture taken with them! And I would also like to recreate the rap from Get Down for them.
Oh man if I had a video camera I would make a video about how much I love doing that rap and you could all see it.
Buy me a video camera

Bang bang bang
here we come
here we slam
it's the fun factory
with the BSBs
get on your knees
Backstreet Boys
are you with it?
AJ, hit it!!

Come on girls and get down
smack it up, flip it,
move it all around
here it is,
if you want to get hit
this'll put you
at the top of my list,
UH!

these eyes have seen a lot of love but they're never gonna another one like they had with you

I'm so angry today. It's just one of those times. Not irritable angry or pointless angry but more calm angry about specific situations and happenings and about how hard society has it set up for us all to be decent people.
How hard human nature makes it for us to all be decent people.

Oh yes, I am keeping in mind that I am somewhat hormonal. But I frequently am, so it's kind of a moot point, really.

Also, I only made $20 at work tonight which is beyond silly and because it's not a stat holiday I didn't get paid time -and-a-half. Yuck. Especially since I made the BFF's family hurry back to the city to get me to work.
Double yuck.

Got out of the city last night!!!
Made the BFF take me out to the farm with her. Hurrah x 100!
And I was really apprehensive about it, like everything would fall apart if I were away for 24 hours. It didn't seem to. I'm good at quitting worrying though, so it works out.

Spen and I ate a shit-tonne of food and drank some and bonded some and scrabbled some and got worn-out by a 7-year-old some. Pictures and story tomorrow hopefully.

I didn't even take any pictures of the proper farm/cottage because I was too taken with this remarkable thing:

It's very, very wild. And great. And also wonderful and dumb. All of that. And shockingly small inside. It's so epic from the exterior though..




I've decided to convince BFF's parents to adopt me though. They are pretty great. Straight-forward and kind. And her parents are still totally in love which is FUCKED UP and no wonder she's so grossly well-adjusted (most of the time) and everyone seems to genuinely like each other.
Way to set up unrealistic expectations.
Gross.

Aaaand I left my bike at their house and after work I went to pick it up and found it completely tuned up and oiled. WTF? So thaaat's why people have dads...
no but I was pretty thankful, but I'm definitely moving in, they have tonnes of room so no worries...


You know what though, the part in Superbad where Michael Cera sings "These Eyes" is one of the funniest moments around.

Also, Break It To Them Gently is such a hilarious, epic song. It's so intense.
I'd like to be able to recreate my mother's Random Rock mixed tapes sometime. I'm pretty close, I bet.

Haha Dollface just called from purgatory, er (there's your scrabble word, Spen), Ottawa, and we talked for like an hour. Time apart is too much for us really.

wooooooooooooooooo

ac = my true love

Long time ago in college I used to get these little packages of cinnamon cream cheese for my bagels and goddamn they were good.
Anyone seen this cinnamon cream cheese lately? Whatever happened to it? Huh Philadelphia?


Had dinner last night with some peeps at some place on Queen street it was alright I didn't stuff my face like I usually do. Good thing! Talked about gross things as per usual sorry other customers.
They had unusually long carrot curl garnishes.

drank at their house afterwards, thanks for all the booze, dudes

stop taking their picture:

Went to college with those two. Used to hate that redheaded one. Now I think he's pretty funny. Sposed to go do some rap songs with them this week.





I ate some yogurt, it was good. day one of the activia challenge.. I hope it includes binge drinking


redhead stupid face party


I found the cat and pressed it to my face what a dreamboat cat, no you don't even know, he's so good.

He is the best behaved cat I've met. And look how soft he is.

his name is Jonathan Tip-Top Taylor Thomas Chirovsky. Beat that.


Oh lordy too many things to do that I'm avoiding. Thanks blogger for helping me out on the avoidance front.

I want to get out of this city tonight but I don't know if that's practical and proper.

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

Still working on calming the eff down. So far... it's going alright.

Also, holy moral issues of mine own and everyone around me. What the hell right and wrong, so subjective, etc.

I think Temp-Cat is leaving me today. Sad emoticons.
Good thing I knew she was only temp. And good thing I'm never around enough to be the best pet owner.

don't let the lameout get you down

man I totally lamed out last night. I suck. I was supposed to go to a rad pool party at Spenny's BF's (parent's) house but by the time I got around to thinking about leaving it was so late and the party was so far.
I kind of regret not going. But whatevers.
You can't party all the time.
Oh wait.
Yes you can. Just try harder.

Oh yeah, btw, one of my very favourite friends is doing the lead in this docudrama movie that I'm shooting this month! How fun for us! Except my part is very easy and small and relatively stress-free and her part is extensive and intensive so many she was scared by my "PARTY ALL THE TIME SET PARTY YEAAAHHHH" text message.
I'm not going to bother her while she's working.
Also, she's been a successful, working actor for years, since she was a kid, and she's known me for all of this time where I have been just starting out. Maybe she thinks being on set will be strange for us. I am mostly just excited though. I'm hoping for Fun Times and that sort of business.

Also, found out I'm doing four days on it so YEAH HUH that means maybe I will make some dollar dollar bills and you'll be very excited for me not dying on the street that soon. Maybe.

Had Sneaky Dee's hats-on brunch times with some skate kids I found in the road, they bought hats from Honest Ed's for 60 cents. Sexy timez.


oh hi freckles

There was a duck-billed platypus there;


a teen heart-throb;


and just a regular good-times man wanting to enjoy his coffee in peace.



Is is terrible that I've eaten at Sneaky Dee's three times this week? Yes. Probably definitely.
And good-god-damn do I like the guacamole exquisito! So delicious like you can pretend that it's a salad except for all that sour cream piled on the top I came nowhere near finishing it this morning and now I wish I had those left-overs right now.
Sigh.

I trolled around some dollar stores for awhile this afternoon. I've over-shopped the two on College and I know them too well, never surprised by their wares.
I'm so glad there's not a dollarama right by my house because I would be in deep shit. Deep deep piles of $1 shit and everyone would be like "why do you own this?" and I'd be like "Because it cost ONE DOLLAR!!!"
bad news scene

Okay too many possible parties not enough concrete party times tonight where will be the funnest? Who knows!!!
Where my party people at, yo?

Dinner first, I'm sure that'll lead to party town. Right? Yes.

broken right outside of my heart

Guess what, guys?!?

I totally cracked a rib.

How? Wakeboarding. I'm very hard-core like that.

(Actually, it was just from when I fell on my face while walking into wakestock, but same diff.)
I thought I just had sore arms/chest from falling, but then my one upper rib keeps on hurting and hurting and hurting. And when I tried to stretch everything out yesterday, thinking it would help out, it only made it much worse. I almost didn't leave the house but of course I did. Party all the time.
Goddammit does sneezing not feel very fun, though. Nor laughing, even. Nor making out so don't even start with me. just kidding always okay for making out.



Sorry I'm such a terrible blogger lately. Whoooooops!!!
I'm going to blame google reader and also my intrinsic whiney nature.
Haven't even been too busy, really.
Yesterday I slept in until 4 pm, basically. Beat that.
But then I stayed up until about 5 am last night, so that worked out. Party town.
What a great lifestyle.



BTW, my friend has the best rooftop deck that's only like 5 houses down from me (srsly, string-can-phones, pls) and I'd never been to it, until yesterday. can you even believe that noise? Me neither.



Also, she bought me iced coffee (she's a kindergarten teacher and lives off the gift cars she gets at the end of the year. good times) and fed me fresh-baked banana-chocolate-chip muffins.
I tried to move in but she totally kicked me out.




But she gave me a can of corn (how neighbourly) so that I could make my (now) famous Thursday Chili!

THURSDAY CHILI
1 big onion, chopped
4 cloves of garlic, crushed
some oil
some water
some Italian seasoning
(cook that all for awhile)
1 big jar of salsa
some left-over pasta sauce that you think probably isn't quite rotten
1 can of kidney beans
1 can of neighbourly corn
1 tiny sample bottle of Frank's Red Hot Sauce that they were giving away in front of the skydome the other day
(cook for some more time)
1 package of veggie ground-round (or real beef, if you prefer)
cook some more

THEN EAT IT ALL UP

I ate so much of it I thought I would vomit, but in the end, I did not!!!

Omg vomiting would hurt my rib I bet.

Went to Nick and David's show the other night. David works at Aunties and I love him. He's the cutest/surliest and his songs are lovely and heartbreaking. He hadn't played in forever. I was happy to hear him again.
And Nick was fantastic, as always.









Lots of lovely ladies came too and we partied down. Dollface and I ended up at Sneaky Dee's at 2 for last call and way, way too much food. So classy stuffing our faces like food is going out of style.

Now flippin Dollface is in flippin Ottawa for 10 days, eff that, oh yeah, she says that her mum reads this sometimes, HI DOLLFACE MUMSKIES.
I like Dollface's parents. They came to Octopus with us, which is awesometown of them.
They also have a part-electric car and I was like "this car is way too quiet, it must not be on" but it was!!!

We went to Dakota last night to party down in celebration of Dollface's leaving (wait, that didn't come out right) and ended up see The County Boys. Wish I brought my camera so I could've taken pictures of the babes for you. Too bad so sad. Super fun band though, if I were less cracked, I would've danced.
Also, banjo is a hot hot thing to play. Too bad, it just is. I don't care.

We (Dollface) got hit on so ridiculously badly, we were being beyond rude, but boys are so dense. It was awkward a little bit. Tried to make my favourite Elliott Brood-er run interference for us but he was too awkward about it. I really like that guy though, when he talks I think about how much I love Elliott Brood and then I feel glad.
I had a weird email this morning from one of the hitting-on-dudes who wanted on Dollface, he found this blog somehow, I'd wager.. but I don't know how. Holy welcome to awkward internet times.
He apparently just wanted to know if Dollface plays Ultimate Frisbee.
She doesn't, but she does sometimes have Ultimate Fighting Championships.
With me.
....Naked (yes we all saw that payoff coming.)

I'm getting into telling everyone I have a boyfriend. I think it's funny. I guess it isn't as funny to other people as it is to me.


I don't know what kind of flowers this is, but I bought it today, it cost $2 and it brightens my home. When I notice it, at least.



Oh yeah, I totally have Chelsea Hotel No. 2 on repeat. Like you would not even believe it. It's so perfectly wonderful and I think to myself 'at least I can have mad affairs if I'm going to be perpetually single... and then make poetry that maybe makes it all worthwhile'
I don't care if you don't Leonard Cohen because I like him enough for the both of us.