f you

Ugh the Eye Weekly site is being a pain in the butt.
I want to know how many stars already. That site is seriously effed.
What a tease you are, Eye Weekly!!!

Yay! First show OVER!
Now two days to chill out max and relax all cool.

It went well. Without a hitch. No one fucked it up. I couple of minor omitted lines, tongue-tripping.. but nothing major.
My castmate, Fever's, boyfriend (or "cast boyfriend" as I like to call him) came and brought us roses and a cake (fuck you cleanse). Awww. Our stage-manager's dad laughed his heart out. Which was nice since it was a pretty quiet crowd. And Fever's mum came straight from the airport from Vancouver with luggage in tow to see opening night, and she was soooo proud. Aww. Made me pretty jealous that my mum didn't get to be there. And the rest of my family too.
I think I'm going to apply to Saskatoon fringe next summer. Yeah? yeah.

We realized backstage that we'd all told our friends to come later in the run and we actually had no idea if anyone was going to show up. At all. No, really. But we ended up having 18 people. Which isn't a horrible sized audience.

Afterwards we trekked over to the Fringe club where we drank and I ate some roasted corn (so good) and had a couple of bits of ice cream and I even had beer (fuck you, wheat).
The DJ was 100% utterly completely ABYSMAL.
No seriously though.
Holy hell we're not all coked-up clubbers here. One beat is not our style. We want to break. it. down.
I finally went up to him and asked if had any Motown or even any retro Madonna.
He started playing some alright stuff and the dance floor packed. He kept the songs on for hours though. If a song was popular he'd play if for around 7 minutes. Beyond annoying.
We did dance though. And I, especially, danced like a maniac. Trying to make dancing into my work-out. And I'm actually feeling it today. Which is kind of wild. I did good work.
I need to watch more hip-hop abs videos so I can take those sweet moves to the dance floor.

Everyone wienered out early except Fever and I, we stayed for one more drink and to watch the crowd of actors. And ended up having a nice bonding session. We've never hung out much, just the two of us. It was nice.

I saw a babe and then he started dancing and then it turned out that he wasn't very babely.. he was allll shoulders. But he loved it so much. The dancing, I mean. It's hard to fault someone for looking silly when they are obviously having so much fun.
What a dilemma!

It was totally my first day to sleep in in forever and I only slept for 7 hours. wtf, body.

Ugh. ACTRA. Ugh.
I just got an email from a friend of a friend requesting my services as actor for a feature film that she is directing. Just for a little part with no pay or anything, but still. I want to be able to do whatever I'd like. I don't like when people tell me what I can and cannot do.

Have to clean up my apartment for my new temp-cat who is coming over tonight!
Excited!!!

SIGH.

sigh.

Babe-Break!
Keep on keeping on.


The more time I spend with my camera, the more I realize that I am still just learning. It's still frustrating to want something I'm not getting. I need an off-camera flash so, so badly. No kidding. All my show pictures are so grainy because I'm shooting 1600 stylez at like 1/30 to get enough light in that mother.
whatever. still learning. still good eye, still keeping at 'er, etc.

Things are already beginning to calm down. Which seems weird since I have tech run today and then we open on Wednesday. But I'm done working for a bit, whoa, a week and a half apparently. So hot. And I made a bit of money (never enough) at the dome this weekend so maybe I won't be starving on the streets.. maybe.

Oh my god I'm making hashbrowns (whatever, cleanse, I can have oil and potatoes.. so...) and they look seriously spectacular. It's the spices. Hungry hungry hungry.
So good.

I totally had a couple of drinks last night! Ahahaahah I am so bad at cleansing. Whatever I didn't even have mix.. just water so there. Best thing about cleanse - cheap drunk.
I think I'm planning to stay off wheat for another week at least (maybe life) to see if I continue to feel pretty great. But I love beer. And I do not love Budweiser.


Fun fun show at Wavelength at Sneaky Dee's last night. Weirdest bill - Wordburglar then Entire Cities (I didn't make it for the first band).

Review soon! I promise (maybe)!

I can't believe it's tech run already. First time in the venue.. the play is looking good though. Better and better. By Wednesday we should kill it.
No sign yet of my eternal performance-cold.. but I'm sure it's en route.
I hate being sick during performances.

My irritability seemed to lift about half way through yesterday. I'm hoping it never returns.

Flickr's being a pain. Looks like you get to wait for photes.

more sushi plssssss

Holy holy no updateskies sorry sorry

Yikes. I'm so excited for when my life gets way less busy. Which will be in a couple of weeks? Hopefully?
Maybe sooner, when all I have to concentrate on is fringing.
Too much working/socializing/rehearsing/cleansing

sta-ressss-in me out man

Don't worry though because I'm feeling like I'm about to have an outpouring of creativity. Soon. At some point.
I have many ideas, I just need to implement, fruition-ize.

Seriously people at skydome, learn to tip! I don't even make minimum wage! How will I make rent? Waiting for your quarter change? srsly?

Been downright irritable the past couple of days. Hitting the point in the cleanse where I can't remember what in hell made me get into this mess and why I would be doing it at all.
Just feeling very deserving of treats and very close to cheating every few minutes. And just angry about having to do it. Not fun.
Hopefully this feeling ends soon. Tomorrow maybe.
Gotta make it til Thursday. God dammit.

Also worrying about the fringe.. the play will be good, funny, etc. You should come see it.
But I think it could be better.
And spending that much time with anyone is hard.. and you know me.. not good at people. We are all completely different types of personalities and trying to work them all together is hard work. Obviously.

It has made me really want to do more theatre though. And do it well. And work hard at (I should learn those skills someday, at least).
Also, going through and giving the girls feedback the other day (there's a huge chunk in the middle that I'm not in so I feel like I have a bit of perspective..) made me miss being a director. I love bossing!
I'm the bossiest boss ever. Especially lately. Lately all I do is boss. And criticize. I am pleasure to be around!
People love me.


I need to start reviewing things. So badly. I do have opinions and thoughts on a bunch of stuff. Need to start getting it out of my head.
Went to see Young People Fucking last night, definite thoughts on that. (Like not enough D, etc)
And Pu-Erh tonight at the Fu-Gen Festival, even more thoughts there, maybe.

After the play we went for sushi and I could eat it even so there! First time eating out in days! Very unlike my usual lifestylez. My friend is on a for-life diet plan that restricts her eating many of the same things. It's nice to have buds in the same boat.

I think I'm going to stay off wheat for a few more days at least, I'm feeling that it might be a problem for me.


Hey guys. I'm having hair issues. Like, so, I love my hair, right? Especially since it stopped being that horrendous shade of bright red/purple and toned down to look more natural.. but it does look pretty nice when it's darker red. But lighter is nice for summer... I'm torn!





I think I mostly want it like it is in this picture:

But that colour is so hard to keep! Unless you're like that babe next to me and it's real.

Thoughts???





Oh, also,
a mouse JUMPED ON MY HEAD today
I screamed.
I was chasing him a bit and I think he must have ran up the curtain and launched himself onto my head! He seemed to come out of nowhere! Terrifying!
My life sucks.
Oh yeah, and this time around they're eating the peanut butter (and cheese and hummus and whatever else I have) right off the traps! I have no idea how they're wrangling, but I hate them. I hate them!!!

the bars are still open, even

I feel like I came home early tonight but it was actually after midnight.. and that's not early for most people.
I still love my lifestyle.

Still feeling pretty awesome, gotta say. A little upset that wheat or sugar or both might be playing a much smaller role in my life from this point onwards.

Rehearsed today in a big space for the first time. In costumes, with props. Makes all the difference.
I was told that I am much, much better off book "like night and day".
That hurt my feelings briefly until I realized that I was actually just pretty upset with myself for being such a bad worker. I have no discipline and I am LAZY.
Not that any of us have been on it with this play, we really are having to work to step it right up for performances next week. But still.
She's right, too. I am much better. I feel like I am bringing so much more to my character with every new line. If I had started this weeks ago, you'd be in for a wild treat.
But as it is it's going to be pretty funny, I'd bet.

It's easy to be lazy with film. They'll just cut. You don't actually need to know your lines at all. Because you only have to do a few of them at a time...





I'm tiredtiredtired all of a sudden. But today I woke up before my alarm. Which basically never happens unless my alarm is set for 1.

Apparently wheat exhausts you, who knew?

aw no no no no no no times

Turns out I can have fun sober!
I mean, I know that I used to be able to, but it's a nice reassurance. Dollface pointed out that I act the same either way. Too true, my friend.
I told my bartending friend last night that I could baby-sit for him, then I told him that next time I'd tip him for my drinks in cocaine, then as I was leaving I said "don't worry I'm RESPONSIBLE. all. the. time."
He was nice, let me eat my bean salad and not buy anything. It's okay because that Dollface can drink enough for both of us. SEX PANTHER ALE


Video from Sass from the Jesse Landen Band show last night (fine they're still called Born to Busk but I don't know why).
Mostly good because of my mad dance skillz, and I think the end is the best part. I should be on TV. Oh, wait. I am.
I like it better when he sings this song high up. Just in case anyone cares what I think.

I have so much to say and absolutely no time to write it!

"Has anyone ever told you that you look like that girl from that commercial...?"
"No, I am much MUCH prettier than her!!!"

I had such a fun time at work yesterday. Sometimes I get in really great work-moods where every beer-drinker is my best friend and all my customers take well to being made fun of.. then I remember how much I like my job.

Rehearsal reahearsal rehearsal rehearsl afhrahahlalsal
I am out and about for usually 14 hours these days! Not enough hours in the day. Needless to say, my afternoon naps have fallen by the wayside. But I haven't been too tired. And never hung over.

Um. I kind of think I'm feeling better and better each day of this cleanse?
I'm also not a horrendously tired anymore, and fairly naturally happy, despite no caffeine and no sugar. Pretty wild.

Also, how was I supposed to know that couscous is made with wheat, that it's not a sort of grain or rice product? Hmm???
Well. I didn't eat very much of it so WHATEVERS.

Dear anywho who wants to do a cleanse,

I recommend you stay in your house and lock the doors.

Oh the world is so full of tasty things that I am not allowed to have! Everyone else this evening got to have beers! Luckies!
I tried to make my friend describe the taste to me.
She wouldn't.

I gave people some of my seeds, nuts, and carrots. I'm a sharer and a carer.

Oh good lord how pizza sounds like the best idea in the world. I was actually fine until I went to work today. The skydome is the most inhospitable place on earth for healthy eating of any kind. It's remarkable, really.

I am strong though, and my belly has been feeling really great these past couple of days (knock wood) not swollen as it usually is, not constantly painful.
We'll see, maybe I will yet become a fantastic eater!

figures

So, my first film audition in awhile and guess what the part is!!???
A fat girl!
Okay, so not fat exactly - "less than svelte and not a little imposing"

HAVE YOU EVER MET ME?

Okay, so I guess some of you actually, technically, haven't.
5'1 (and a half I guess)
117 pounds (I don't actually own a scale, but last time I weighed myself, it was around there)

Oh yeah, the character is also a lesbian, and an action star fighter-girl.................

There's something remarkably freeing about going out for a part that I have no hopes of getting.
Usually when it's a big American movie all of these parts have actually been cast already, but under ACTRA guidelines (or something) they have to audition a certain amount of local performers. I feel like casting directors use these opportunities just to see people - it has little to do with the actual character being cast, and more with who they feel like having a look at.
But that's just a theory.



Still on my cleanse.. I had a nap this afternoon (surprise) and I dreamt almost entirely of eating sugar. I kept accidentally eating it and then feeling really guilty and then eating more and more and more sugar.
I'm not actually that crave-y in real life, but I am pretty heartily addicted to sugar.
I'm living off strawberries and off apple slices with almond butter. Yeah huh.

Oh yeah, also, I'm off coffee for the next little bit. It was fun being addicted to it for awhile there, but now it's time to go back to it giving me that Ultimate High every one in awhile. I'm tired.



I'm still feeling pretty shitty so it's okay if I share this self-indulgent story.

My cousin's wedding took place in Waseca, Sask. this weekend, and I didn't get to go because I'm stuck all up in this big smoke, living the dream, etc. But one of my girl-cousins told my mum this story:
Her boyfriend and her are watching TV and the ice breakers commercial comes on and her boyfriend says "Oh, there's that girl" and my cousin is like "what do you mean?" and he says "well the guys all think she's hot" (and by "guys" he means the military firefighters he works with!!) and then my cousin is all "That's my cousin!"

So. In conclusion, you know who I'm big with?
Firefighters
Asians (I know this because of plentyoffish and because Sass is totally always trying to hit this)
17-year-old boys


It's funny because I don't even look particularly hot in that ad, Mum says it's because I look approachable. Like I wouldn't shut them down. Which is kind of hilarious since I am quite the opposite in real life. I have so ridiculously little patience for idiot-babes being idiots. Especially if the idiocy involves hitting on me.

No, jk, babes! Hit on me!
Well, in 12 days anyhow. When I've cleansed myself and become a born-again virgin.

Ew.

good-bye flava

Holy lord why do salt and sugar make everything taste oh-so much better?
And why can't I have them!?

So. I must have completely 100% lost my mind.
It's official.

Whilst doing this food cleanse I am also giving up for the next 12 days:

1) alcohol (Mostly, anyhow. Obviously this should go hand-in-hand with the cleanse and I am dangerously close to feeling alcohol dependent, so I could use a break. )

2) cigarettes (I have never been addicted to these buggers, but they sure do show up in my mouth a lot)

3) babes (Once I told my friend, "you have too many babes. Even if the right one was in there somewhere, you wouldn't be able to find him".. I have never taken my own advice. And even though I specifically said that I do not want a repeat of last summer, that is exactly what seems to be happening.. )


I know.
Holy am I going to be a terror.
No, probably not though.

This particular cleanse - Wild Rose Herbal D-Tox is fairly straight-forward. There's herbal supplements and a tincture, and then a food plan. And I can eat as much as I want/need, just only of certain foods.
Hopefully, upon completing the cleanse I will gradually re-introduce possible allergens and see if maybe some of my lethargy/spaciness/headaches/belly-pains are food related.
Wheat is a big one I'm going to look at, as well as yeast and fermentation. And I def have dairy issues, so we'll see how I fare off of that business.
(Oh lord, please don't make me give up cheeeeeses!)

In other news, I think I cured my cold. Or I'm saving it up for when I go onstage next week (I've never done a play without getting sick).

Meredith R. Mistletoe's cure for the common cold (horrendously sore throat): Party All The Time


Now it's time for my regular afternoon nap.