sing a little sweeter and love a little longer...

You would think I would learn to not write about people on here. No matter how 100% certain I am that they would never bother to find and also read it.
To be fair, I advertise this blog to everyone and encourage people to read it.. I assume everyone knows that any interaction they have with me will end up on here.
But.
I realize that when I say something different on here than what you perceived in real time, it can be bad.
And also, when I assume a person doesn't read this, I am more likely to write over-honest about them.

This has bitten me in the ass probably twice this week, if my sitemeter leads me true.

With one especially, I was so convinced that he'd never read this that at one point I wrote this:
"I can write whatever I'd like about him on here because if he ever found this and bothered to read it I would have a heart attack and die of surprise. And then I would eat my hat."

Yike.

It's not that I'm done with caring and I'm not angry about late night phone calls, I'm just frustrated with the Jekel and Hyde thing that happens when I try and make us actually be friends.
I do quite like him.

Deciding what is actually true, sorting emotions, etc, is hard work.
Such hard work.

.

Don't worry Graeme, my hoodia is not saw dust, it's CERTIFIED.


Also, I picked the shiniest box - it's all gold and green - so obviously it's the best.
This hoodia experiment is not going to be able to chart seeing as I don't have a scale. Well, I do have a scale, but it definitely isn't accurate. It's over by about 10 pounds, and I'm not just saying that to make myself feel better.

Anyway, hoodia. I feel like I will probably loose weight on this even if it is 100% placebo/sawdust. Because I have now made a definitive step towards my goal. And it will keep me aware that I'm trying to do that. If I take it before my meals, I am aware that I if I eat crap, I will only extend this process. And since it recommends drinking a lot of water with it (obviously) then I will be more aware of that as well. And drinking enough water is one of the biggest weight things. Sometimes when I feel hungry I'm just dehydrated, and even though I know this, I sometimes forget.

Man, being an actor is so shitty. My body is so great, it's pretty much the perfect size ever for me. If I weren't an actor.
But this is my chosen career. And I need to take it seriously and do everything in my power to advance and sell myself.
Which means having a camera body. Which is dumb.

Sigh.

My printer is broken I don't know how I am going to launch the (horrendously) long-awaited next issue of Et Puis? News Magazine.

Guess what?
I'm avoiding doing things I should really really really really really get to!!!!!

i'm an idiot and also very pretty

I bought some weight-loss drugs that I'm going to try. And by drugs, I mean Hoodia. I don't like the word hoodie. Or hoodia. But we'll see. I'll keep you posted. I'm mostly doing this for humour value(?)... oh yeah, and because I'd like to get rid of about 10 lbs.
Oh, come on now, I've done stupider things!
First sign of anal leakage and I'm totally done though.


A man came into the ice cream store with his son who was having a total melt-down, crying and screaming and all of the like, just out of control.
The father picked up the boy and plopped him down on the counter top and held his shoulders and said,

"Dude? Chillage!"

And the little dude calmed right down and repeated,

"Yeah. Chillage..."

(I told that story like it was mine, but it was fact my co-worker's)


No time not enough time there should be more time in my worlds,

Still haven't caught up on my sleep. That's the plan for tonight. Oh, except for how I have about a billion and a half things to do.
And when I worked at big chill on the weekend I got to talking about the script that I should be working on, called Major Babes... oh man, it's such a funny idea.
I NEED MORE TIME
just in general, just in life.

Tonight I especially have to alter some bridesmaids dresses and learn a flipping monologue for rehearsal tomorrow.

I wish so hard that I didn't have to work today. It's a stupid day game and no one's going to buy beer. Hates it!



Dinner last night at Victory with Sass and co. Seriously such good food there. Oh chili chili. Yeeeah huh.



Both Sass and I went on our first dates with babes who still get to us at Victory. But nothing will ruin that place for me. Except for maybe flood or fire, it's hard to party down in a blazing building..



.
.
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Woken again at three a.m. by the phone. Didn't pick up but then I called right back because
I TOLD YOU NOT TO DO THAT
And then I thought, oh geez, I hope he's okay.
Yeah he was fine
Quelle Surprise!
I told him I'm done caring. and that he can do whatever he wants but I'm still not caring.