density intensity

It's been brought to my attention that I am not receiving my bff's text messages. Maybe I am also not receiving yous.
That's why you haven't been paying attention to me, I guess, it's probably just not getting through.
It's generally pretty hard to get through to me.
Dense.



Don't carry the bananas in with the cans of beans on your bike. Unless you are looking to make banana bread, in which case, do.

I think I might be dying all my muscles have been hurting for days and I haven't really been over-doing it. At all.
Except with party-town, I suppose.

I like how I was at the grocery store last night at midnight and going home but then ended up at Sneaky Dee's for nachos and pitchers of Cool lager until 2:30...
Story of my life.

I really didn't realize how many forms of rice I bought last night. Kind of embarrassing.
rice cakes
crispy minis
rice crackers
rice krispies

Lately all I want to do is sing sing sing for my supper (in which case I would likely starve), I blame this on Joan Baez.

Have to go by my agency to pick up a binder of research info for my docudrama re-enactment role. Yikes.

in negotiations

I have such a worried face this morning and all of yesterday with trying to negotiate how I was feeling with how I should be acting.
By which I mean, I want to be able to not push everything all the time. And I want to be able to let things come naturally and not need constant reassurance. Or something.

I cannot make my heart sit still I am unable to stop looking for the next best thing. I am terrified of being heart-broken even though that would be probably the best thing for me, kind of.
I can't help but keep a head full of back-up-plans even if I for sure only want the affections of one certain duder. Because putting all of my eggs in one basket seems for sure like an idiot move even though it's actually the only way to do things, I hear.
I hate feeling vulnerable. It makes me behave irrationally. And like a wiener. And no one likes a wiener. Except other wieners.

I should not write about all this on here, but I feel like this blog only gets about a quarter of anything going on in my life. And that's probably not enough.

It's too bad that you can't just decide to feel a certain way and then go about it. And it's too bad that just because I recognize that a certain behaviour is wrong, doesn't mean I can stop doing it right away..

*edit, none of the duders pictured below are being talked about in this entry, just in case of if you were wondering.

hello miss lady

Cottage-friends reunion party yesterday!!!
(I am going to get to uploading all of the cottage pictures but I'm waiting on a couple to fill in the blanks to write a whole travelogue that will be sure to bore everyone except for me!)

Went to the island with the girls for Wakestock (yes I know!) saw my pro-skateboarder friend (does that impress you?) briefly but missed him skate, sad emoticon. I wanted to go and heckle so badly. We got in because our bffs from cottage-party play in Metric and they missed us so much and needed to see us so badly that they said "come to Wakestock" and we said "maaaaaybe".

We were all completely hung over and completely terribly-mooded. Nice.

I fell so badly flat-on-my-face, actually mostly on my knee, right when we got there. I am a class act. I felt embarrassed. Luckily no one pointed and laughed, to my face anyway.

Wakestock was sucking so we ended up at The Rectory on Ward's island and had some pretty tasty foods.
Sweet sweet Blanche de Chambly mimosas (brilliant) and tri-bean hummus and fudgey brownie. Uh huh yeah.





We only went back to Wakestock in time to see our friends before they went on.
Backstage I pretended to eat a peach which was beat up from being in my bag forever even though "no outside food or drink!"




Then we watched the show! Standing side stage is actually way less fun then you would think, the sound is not the best but it is the best for getting out of the rain (which started the exact moment their set started, no kidding).
I am certainly not a band photographer:




(haha dance party)

My friend was there taking PROFESSIONAL pictures! Fun times for us!


I think he's going to be able to do my headshots for me soonskies! (when I know what I'm doing with my hairs.)


Take me backstage now



(oh yeah, the best part is that they were out of lanyards and so I had the pass fastened to my bikini top. Beautiful.




riders of the storm

(aw sweaty drummer hair)

aggressive affection






Took the ferry back to the city,

They shouldn't have poles on that thing.


Ended up back at Dollface's condo to party down. Made a delicious spread of goodness and I wish my stomach hadn't been hurting all day.. sigh.



I almost got pushed into the tub while wearing one of Dollface's hats, which of course lead to a hats-on bath-tub photoshoot. obviously.





Holy seriously how are my friends so ridiculously good-looking. It's kind of wild.




That's where the night got sloppy. I'm pretty glad that I'm not at Dollface's to help clean up today. We ate, drank, pushed things around, fell over laughing, then left in a hurry to make last call at Dakota.
I was for sure the least drunk and I was in bad shape... so, you know.
When I left people were falling into each other and playing dice in the alley...




"Why do I seriously like these dudes so much?"
"Because they laugh at your jokes even when they're not funny!"
Oh, right.
Except I've never made an unfunny joke in my life.

Haha found this music video for those boys' other band, Bang Lime

Awesome.
I love bears.

I most certainly do not want to go to work today.
No sir.

come on ride me ride me ride me doublies

Surprisingly fun: Dance Cave.
Yeah, I know, filled with 20 year olds. But good dance party last night, gotta admit. Can't front.

Went to Lee's with Dollface and co. to meet up with some skater dreamboats for some skate party but it wasn't as fun as originally hoped and all the skaters ended up upstairs for some reason (less screaming bands, maybe? more young tail maybe?) so we hung there. Got drunked and danced. Pretty good music, some kind of funny bits. Mostly liked Blister in the Sun such a classic I don't even care I am so Angela Chase dancing over being over Jordan Catalano. Even though no one is ever really over Jordan Catalano. I mean he's Jordan Catalano for frig's sake.
Everyone was drunker than me (for once in my life) and belligerent in funny ways.
We saw a skunk on the way home! I wanted to keep it for a pet, but instead I was made to cross the street to walk as far away from it as possible.
What the hell is a skunk doing in downtown toronto.
Aw geez, I should've gotten a picture of the skunk. Could've made some sweet LOLskunks.

Had dinner at Victory with Sass today. Victory is the king of delicious wheat-involved foods but I got veggie chilli and cheese on fries because I'm very health conscious and a good eater.

Tonight I am tired. Despite my 4 hour nap all afternoon. I guess because I walked to work last night, worked, walked all the way from the dome up to Lee's, danced like a maniac (why are my arms so sore, seriously, was I doing chin-ups??), then walked home.
Everything is a bit achy.
But Dollface is covering a bar shift in my hood and so it's pretty much my duty to go and visit her. And there is Hip Hop Karaoke, guaranteed party time. Except my bike is a wienery baby and Gladstone is so far. How come no one wants to come and ride me doublies?

Funniest email of the week is from my friend in Saskatoon:

hey there buddy,
hows it hanging?
nice new picture(s).
well well you'd better get some new party shoes because i will be playing at the dakota tavern on halloween. Friday night party down. MAybe you'll get to make out with a zombie, a cowboy or somebody wrapped in aluminum foil? Doesnt that sound nice? Mark your calendar. talk to you soon buddy

wurd life,
Burke

The best is if you know this dude and you can read it in his slow drawl of a Prince Albert (Sask.) hick accent.
That does sound nice.

I can't keep up with google reader!

Happy birthday Linda Ronstadt!


Also, 5 months until Christmas, which in actuality means 4 months until holiday season. Holy excited!
I know you guys don't want to hear about it because you love sweating and heatstroke and sunburns but I gotta say, looking forward to sweater-weather. And mostly looking forwards to boots and most of all looking forward to holiday joy and cheer and glad tidings for one and all.

And falling leaves. And crispness.


Totally wienered out of going to the Y today because I am just that lazy. Oh yes, and also I needed to sleep in, clean the house, bathe (for once in my life already), and then walk to work (and buy one of those stupid-good healthy muffins from Urban Herbivore goddamn those things are delicious).
For some reason my bicycle is not cycling properly. It is being a silly little bitch and I inspected it but I cannot find the cause of its anger with me. I'll take it to Spenny's dad maybe and he can have a look-see.

Went to the gym yesterday though, so there. Whatever. Also walked all over the stupid city. Good for me!
Walking is for sure 3 times better activity than biking. But it takes such a stupid long time. Oh yeah, ipod! I remember why walking was fun. I'm going to get some more comedy albums! Then I wander around giggling like a lunatic.
Valid impression.


If I ever manage to escape from work tonight I'm going to be taking some babes to go scope skatebabes at a Wakestock oriented party at Lee's tonight. Skatebabes skatebabes skatebabes skatebabes. mmmmmhmmmmm. yes.

I love a good man who hasn't ever showered.


CRAP. ipod is frozen.
not a dangerous sad face yet, so we'll see.

Ow my bell feels like it's full of hammers. or maybe bars of soap. Nothing pleasant anyhow. Musthave been all those grilled cheeses and berry crisps last night. Thanks a lot, Dollface!
(so delicious)

my new headshots by David Leyes

haha jokes
these are the photos from when David Leyes was shooting outside of Big Chill

I refused to make good faces because, well, that's what I'm into. Bad faces.

Does anyone want to buy me some headshots?
Where is my sugar daddy?
Where is my blessed patron of the arts who wants to invest fully in my career?

My life is hard!

good morning world, let me barf on your face

Oh hi, booked a part!

Also, so hung over. I'm having issues typing because of how it is making me nauseous.
Yuck.
It's okay I don't have anything to do today besides brat around on the internet.

Anyhow, apparently going to be doing a couple of days on a tv-movie for the Amercian History channel, about the Manson family. Yikes.
But, Yayayaya. Fun times for me. I've been having dreams lately about being on sets.

Actually I had a really good one the other night. After I posted those videos of Jonathan I dreamt that we were shooting a Home Improvement reunion special together and that we had to share a dressing room (this is where you think it gets naughty) and so we became friends and hung out and went and played in the snow and in the sea (my damn dream, it can make as little sense as I'd like). Then we were late getting back to set and our pay got docked but I didn't care because I had a new best friend!
Sigh.
I was actually in a temper when I woke up because I just wanted to get back into that dream.

I worked at the Big Chill all yesterday and it was rainy and no customers except it was made alright by a bunch of my friends coming visit! Hurrah!
I ate way too much ice cream, quelle surprise.

Then top Toronto headshot photographer, David Leyes came around and they did a shoot in front of the store. He and his cohorts moved all my stuff around, bought ice cream, shot photos (not headshots) and was very charming and congeal. If I had an extra spare $700 lying around somewheres I would totally go get my headshots done with him. For certain. When I'm rich.
Anyhow, it helped waste part of my afternoon, that's for sure.
No, do go look at his website if you haven't already, such good stuffs.
Like I dream of being able to do.

After work went for dinner:



(that's my favourite ring I'm wearing, in case you were wondering)

open-face veggie burger at Last Temptation. Mostly still avoiding wheat, except in beer format, so didn't eat much of the bun.
veggie burger - $3.25, add side salad for $1.25 = good deal


all photos except this one were taken by her, jfyi


weirdly pretty




his face is totally cut off at the side there, click through to see the whole image, same like always.


oh hi fat cutelet face of mine

Nice patio sit. yessss patios.

After that I met up with Dollface and babes in Trinity-Bellwoods and we park-drank and chattered. My BFF, Spenny, came by and we laughed about some things.

Then Dollface and I head over to Sweaty Betty's which was flippin packed like holy jeezus hipsters calm the eff down. But what do I know because after that shot that Tanya "e-talk" Kim bought me I was o-b-l-i-t-e-r-a-t-e-d. For realzzz. She was very very fun and funny though, not lame like (I assume) Ben Mulroney is. Oh except that episode of the Morgan Waters show with Ben. That was okay. Mostly because it was making fun of Ben though... hmm here you go:


Luckily Dollface and cottage-friend Pony Club (yes I really am going to blog about that trip really soonskies) put me in a cab instead of letting me ride my dumb bike home. Not the smartest cookie in the cradle.
I ran home up my street from the cab in bare feet because wedges are not for running in. Why was I wearing heels, even? That's the real mystery of the evening.

K, guys. I need food or something. Why does everyone have jobs? Why isn't it always brunch time???