if you propose, I'll probably say yes...

So.
Two of my all-time best friends are now engaged (and I think it will soon be three, when a bf gets home from fighting in the war [wtf]).
I'm trying to plan my end of summer trip home to be able to go to my friend's wedding.
Yike.

I don't even have a date!!! Who would I bring?

Somehow the invitation coming in the mail and my friend's blog post about getting engaged.. whoaly. I am old.
Everyone I know is involved in weddings and babies.

And it's fine that I'm not. It's better for me. I'm doing well and I'm happy and most days I'm not concerned that I haven't ever had a long term relationship.

Sort of.

But who would I even be if I was busy dating someone? Would I still want to party all the time? Would I still be allowed to ogle dudes and blog about them?
Nope. Relationships are probably just not for me.

According to Facebook, pretty much everyone my age from school now has kids. I didn't really need to know. I find it too bizarre.
Not to be judgy mcjudgerson but it seems like they all just have babies instead of doing things with their lives.
I'm not having kids until I'm the type of woman kids would be proud to have as their mother. I don't want to be a mum until I would never have to live vicariously through my offspring. I want to have done and still be doing all the things I dream of and not have to push my kids into things I wish I'd done.

I also want to have kids when they can be my top priority. When I'm finished being this ridiculously self-absorbed (when is that time coming??).

But. At the same time, if my life had played out so that it wasn't completely irrational to have kids right now, I probably would.
No, I totally would.

GIVE ME ALL YOUR BABIES