Sleeping next to someone is difficult. You never really do. It begins to feel like a timed game with too many variables. Obligatory, almost. And you can’t sleep with a giant pea wedged in your consciousness. Unless you’re really drunk.
Sass has relocated (internetly and IRL) is now at joeyng.com. that bit, in particular, from one of her blog posts got to me a bit.
I am bad at sleeping beside people sometimes. Except when I'm not. But the slightest hint of strange or of things left unsaid...
I very much miss having Sass around. I like that she's always awake late on the internet milesandmiles away, though. So I can run things by her and ask if things are too-much.
Ha, guess which I asked were too much? I think I may have asked the wrong person.
These days I am always second-guessing around here and feeling awkward about what I want to post/how it will look/what it means about me.
I am not embarrassed of these pictures. I am embarrassed to go about my daily life and not be this confident and attractive and calmed down (does that make sense?).
I am mostly made up of awkwardness, obnoxiousness, and bravado.
I am nothing like these photos in real-time. That's why I like them. That's why it's fair to post them. They are still almost-honest.
I have no interest in getting in anyone's way.
I have in the past. I've been a terrible friend and I've been a kid. I've put myself in situations I shouldn't have. I have pushed things that needed to be left alone. I've blamed other people.
Mrs thinks that this blog (the photos I post) are a bit asking-for-it.
Longing gazes are not for taking-seriously.
I liked how Raymi the other day was saying very blunt online how she is in relationships. How she is super affectionate, and just listing all these characteristics that she has in relationships. Refreshing, when people are upfront and honest about how they think they are/what they like.
I would never put any of that on here because I am a different sort, plus who knows what I am like, really.
I have a hard time properly kissing anyone who I'm actually interested in.
I thought this post would read stronger but instead it is uncomfortably weak.
Posts
