On Christmas night we were over at my aunt's house for dinner and it was delicious and I was sitting beside a set a shelves filled with (beautiful) knick-knacks and there were a few pocket-watches (I know, a few, right?) and so I picked up the most beautiful one of all and promptly asked for it*. And my aunt said I could have it! And so I took it! And it's beautiful!
It's from my grandad's estate (he hit up a lot of auctions and was the best of hoarders [the living room floor in one (1!!!) of his junk-filled houses even caved in]), it's an antique, I should go get it tuned up and appraised maybe. But it is just beautiful. It has a tiny bird engraved on the back along with flowers all over and also the intials CMM which are almost like mine.
I love it.
*I find it funny to wander through people's houses asking to have the things that I like. I have a hard time asking for things in general therefore this joke is extra funny to me. I also like to wander through and ask "how much did that there set you back?" about pretty everything. Even wives.
I've been in a terrible mood today and yesterday and have not left the house. Which is good actually because I've been needing alone time and also I am broke, so it kind of works out.
But I've just been feeling sad sad. And also tired. And sort of hopeless about things. I know that this is partly hormones and that this too, in time, shall pass.
But,
you know.
I have been being productive though.
I'm almost done completely sorting and updating all of my flickr sets
flickr.com/photos/etpuis
I even made a Most Favourite set, where you can revisit the pictures of mine that I like the very most.
I made cookies!
(and only ate four of them)
I edited a tonne more of the photos from Christmas
(and even uploaded a few)
I wrote
(both here and for my prose stuff and even comedy)
I drew
(want to be much better at that sort of thing)
I cleaned the house
(I wasn't even expecting to, it just sort of happened)
I applied to some jobs
I played with Rudyard who is leaving me tomorrow! Silly beast!
I finished one novel (The Stone Angel, which opened the floodgates)
and started another (Highways and Dancehalls, which has been keeping them open)
I'm pleased to be reading again, to fully immerse and not arise for a few hours. It's been too long since I've done that.
I go through phases where I get convinced that I will never read novels again. I spend far, far too much time on the internet and watch the television.
I also get scared that I'm not smart enough for books, that I won't understand them, that they will bore me and I will be disappointed in myself.
I do love reading though. So, so much.
I'm going back to it now, in fact.
Tomorrow will be a better day. Or at least hopefully not one where the cat follows me around while I weep.
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