I should learn how to worry maybe sometimes

The only thing worse than a man you can't control is a man you can.
- Margo Kaufman

My aunt sent me that quote. I don't know what made her think I would like it.

I'm thinking about getting another job. I'm just too ridiculously broke. And ACC keeps seeming like it's going to give me lots of shifts. And then it doesn't. And Skydome is kind of driving me insane, so disorganized and ridiculous there in the off-season but it's making me mad enough that I'm not sure how much I want to work there this summer...
I think I'm going to apply for some retail jobs at stores I want stuff from so that I can buy the stuff.
Man do I like stuff.
Except there's too much of it in this tiny apartment. I want to throw a bunch of it out. Soon, I think.

Yes, I worked at Skydome yesterday and it was so, so nuts. Everything was a mess and we didn't even have the proper inventory or products. And, of course, there were no supervisors to be found and even when we found them they were pretty useless
"My beer gas is leaking out and that means I have no pressure from the taps"
"Okay" then wanders away.
v helpful
Made a bit of cash but I'm not sure it was even worth it for how annoyed I was.
I'm too broke to think that, though.

Went out last night to Sneaky Dee's with the Cpt and a whole bunch of people but I didn't stay long it was super, super packed and was making me sort of claustrophobic. So I went and met up with Deck and his bffs at Rancho and that was better because I could sit down at least and hear what people were saying and I got to mock people which was fun because I am a bad person.
I've been going on at Deck about how I don't like his band name (Born To Busk) and he told me to make a list of names for him to choose from. This will, undoubtedly, not work. Especially since he is not convinced he's even going to change it. But, anyway, I started a list.
1. Landen Strip
2. Captain
3. Ship Captain
4. (many other variations on the word Captain. Who knows why I was liking this word so much)
5. Deck
6. Subtlety
7. Calisthenics
8. APT (this could be the word Apt or just those letters and then hipsters would all say that it was actually "Apartment" just like how they do shit like that now about MGMT)
7. Providence
8. Trucks

It's number eight that I'm really sold on there. Not necessarily for Deck's band but just in general.


Thinking a lot about my friend AK's discussions of Kind versus Nice.
I really do prefer kindness.
Yes, niceties and politeness and pleasantness do make some situations easier and do make life more smooth, sort of.
But it's the kindness of a person that I am all over. The sense that they are out for good and that they care.

I'm still planning on getting better at being nice.

Man I wrote this entry a few hours ago and then forgot about it now I will publish it and then you can read it!