more california, for ya

There's so many photos from my California trip, here are a few more of them.

this is the face of a lady who is not impressed with all the flights in the world being cancelled.

When we finally did get on a plane we did order a prrrretty sweet snack pack (and several margaritas). Those apricots still live in my purse. I don't know why.

Our Salt Lake City motel room. We went hot-tubbing and then jumped on the beds. So, basically, it was the time of our lives.




To take off a jacket when it has been winter and is suddenly no longer winter.. I can't explain it.

We yelled and jumped and down after getting off the plane and finally being at our actual destination after 36 hours of travel. We were so, so pleased. Just stoked right up.


Our first poolside drinks were beautiful patron margaritas from the friendliest bartender at our hotel. He poured the tequila, looked at us, poured some more. It's like he knew us.


View from our Palm Springs hotel room. It was like a goddamn dream I wish I hadn't woken from.

My uniform for Palm Springs.



It was just me and Carla Ghee together full-time for the first few days of the trip (occasionally accompanied by her film's producer, right) and we started speaking together and finishing each other's sentences and wearing the same outfits by accident (then on purpose).
This brunch place was so great and had bottomless champagne at brunch for $3.99/person. Not kidding. Mimosa city.



everything about Palm Springs seems photoshopped and unreal. And beautiful and lovely. And warm.


Before the screening we had dinner and snuck around the side to where there was a little hotel area and hammocks outside of people's rooms and Carla Ghee immediately got in all of them.

I mean, we all did, really.



I am nowhere near sad here, just bad at photos. We brought so many dresses. It was all we packed, really. And we only wore a few of them.


at the Gay!la party we went to for the Palm Springs film fest we were actually the life of the whole event and constantly talked people into dancing and danced onstage and had an awesome conga line. I like a party with dancing and props (and open bar).


Life by the pool was very hard for me. Just kidding, this was the last day in Palm Springs, so it was rather tough. We were on our way to LA, which was the best, but leaving Palm Springs was nowhere near easy. Especially that day.

This time of year is hard and looking back on this isn't particularly easy. I've only seen Carla Ghee once or twice since coming back and she's going away soon and I don't know what'll happen with our friendship, or even where it's at now. She has her partner anyhow.
My roommate has a new boyfriend and he's her focus now.
Norman spends all of his time writing (big congratulations, in the most sincere way to that guy) these days.
Virtually all of my other friends are married or engaged, and that will always be their priority.

I'm lonely. Not lonely like I don't know enough people-- lonely for a best friend.
Or it's March, or things are changing.

It's weird watching a part of your life coming to an end. I'm not as nostalgia-based as I once was, I'm not as set on holding onto everything, but it's still quite horrific to me. To lose people, to realize I'll never be as important to someone as I'd want to be.

There's possibilities for greatness and newness in change, but it's still something that makes me uncomfortable.

Last time here I said I had changed, but in most ways I'm exactly the same. Exactly the kind of person who expects too much from their friends.
Sometimes it serves me well, sometimes it breaks my heart.