I have to tell you, since I have taken a bit of a step back from my party-all-the-time lifestyle I have a bit of a fear of being seen as a loser.
Does this stem from high-school when I had no friends? Probably.
Anyway, I want you all to know right now that I have PLENTY of opportunities to go out on the town and do billions of wonderful fanciful things and chat up 100 hunks/night but I am CHOOSING to be a bit more calm about things these days.
It has just occurred to me (yes, I am a bit slow, thank you) that I am not taking full advantage of my current situation.
What I mean is, when again in my life am I going to have jobs that take up so little of my time? When will there be another time when I have such few responsibilities?
Right now I work so few hours that I could be working another full time job on top of the jobs I already have. In fact, most people that I work with do have regular day jobs.
So, I'm trying to treat my life a bit more like a job. Use this opportunity to hopefully become more of a "regular man" (see also tworegularmen.blogspot.com for more on being a regular man from Accost and her bff). An upstanding citizen of society (haahahaaaa).
I may even do my taxes.
This summer was stupidly fun and fairly ridiculous but there's only so long that type of lifestyle can go on (no, actually it can go on forever, I've realized. It just probably shouldn't).
I'm not saying that I won't be right back to my party-all-the-time lifestyle 2 months from now (especially if some babe comes along and breaks my heart or something, that's always a good excuse for ridiculous behaviour) but I'm saying that today I'm giving something new a try.
The good news thus far is: I haven't been to a bar since Tuesday and I haven't had a cigarette since Monday. I've spent significantly less money and am feeling less bloated and sick from partying every night. I've completed one major craft project, several little ones, sewn 2 items, and I've been working quite hard on some (really wonderful) writing projects.
If I want to be a writer, and I think I'm concluding more and more that I do (since no one will just write my damn ideas out for me already), then I need to start actually writing. Treating writing like a job. I have to learn how to write even when I don't feel like it. I need to figure out how to keep going and how to work through things.
Right now I expect that I can just sit down and write something and it'll just come out genius. This is probably not true (and definitely not proven) so I need to do some actual work.
I'm 100% certain (yes, actually, technically 100%) that I have some genius ideas. But I bet most people do. It's only the ones who follow through on them, who are willing to keep going when it stops being fun that get anywhere.
And, MAN, do I ever stop when it stops being fun.
WORST CHARACTER TRAIT
along with laziness, of course.
I never go out onto the balcony on the 2nd floor. Though I could, in theory, the exit is off the hallway and my neighbour is never home, anyway.
It's a good thing it's lovely out these days and that Christmas is coming (two months until my birthday!) because it makes it way more possible for me to feel positive and hopeful.
Also, I really think keeping up with my vitamins is the best plan.
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