1.16.2010

my chest feels empty. hollow, like maybe my heart has vacated for a second or so

I always forget just how much I love Ghost World. I mean, I know that I love it, right? I know that it's my favourite and all.. but when I actually watch it.. it makes so much sense to me. 

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I drew that snowflake on my wrist several days in a row over Christmas starting on Christmas morning when I got a pen that's excellent for drawing on skin, and I loved it so much. I wanted to get a tattoo of such a snowflake right there. Which is a bit of a silly thing for a film + tv actor to do (tattoos are a pain) oh yeah not to mention my other jobs would not approve.  Really thick watch?

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So I won't get it done. At least not there. But snowflakes somewhere? I'm thinking about it. Who wants to buy me a snowflake tattoo?

Work tonight was great, I was in a great mood, I picked up this shift today I wasn't originally scheduled for it but thank god because it ended up making up for the huge amount of tips I physically lost while I was walking to the staff room last weekend.

Here is a picture from this past Christmas morning:
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it is kind of making me feel better right now. make fun of me all you want, but I'll tell you that christmas (when used effectively) is lovely and soothing and heart-warming and full of promise (even when it's just passed. leave me alone).

Yeah, personally, not feeling awesome tonight. I sort of like to think about how when everything goes wrong it's just getting ready for things to go really, really right.
And how I wouldn't feel like I truly deserved all the wonderful things that are coming my way unless I went through all of this messiness first.

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Right? Right.
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