categorising is best for keeping your tallies
b) Count mullets
I don't know if I can count the guy who had shaved the sides of his head but had the rest in a long, multi-tiered pony-tail, but he gets counted for awesomeness alone.
c) Count neck tattoos
Seriously? On your neck?
d) Count tear-away pants
These should make a comeback.
e) Desperately want to be friends with the hipsters who've come in over-the-top white-trash outfits and wigs
f) Hit on a babe who when you I.D. him turns out to be only 19
g) Ask to be sent home every few minutes
h) Ask your partner really awkward questions about her sex life then refuse to divulge any information about your own
[If you even have a sex life. Lucky.]
.
I have to say that I was quite surprised about how many of the white trash stereotypes were proven true today. Although inquiring into a couple of moustaches I learned that they were only acquired today - special for the event.
I wonder if my appreciation of moustaches is going to be long-lasting.
I guess I did really love Magnum P.I. as a child. Though I could never really figure out if I wanted him for a father or for a husband.
Okay, one more list.
PEOPLE I CLAIMED WERE MY FATHER AS A CHILD:
- Fathers of people I've dated
Babes do not find this joke funny
- Spock
(it would explain the ears)
- Captain Kirk
- God
(God IS SO my daddy)
- Magnum P.I.
- The imaginary one I spoke to with frequency for a while there
- All the dads that came to pick up kids from my daycare
They all got called dad, so how was I to know that wasn't their name? Actually I went through a phase where all men were called dad. Once in the supermarket my mum left me for a second and came back to find me shaking my finger at a man doing something I must have disapproved of saying, "No, Dad. Stop. No, Dad!"
Yeah-huh.
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