*spoiler alert(but why you would care is beyond me)*
Here ya go!!!
NEW MOON:
wow this is so bad it's almost good. I keep thinking this is a joke. is this a joke? Did someone upload their own remix of this movie that's a joke?
Hey that girl I like from Up in the Air is in here! She can play 17 and 25 in movies made in the same year. I want to too! And get nominated for an oscar!
NICE WEAVE, Lautner, also you are so awkward it's physically hurting me
"edward I know you believe you lost your soul, but I don't believe it so don't worry and MAKE ME A VAMPIRE ALREADY" -Bella Swan being most responsible
edward almost came in his pants (or took a bite of her) when they kissed good night. It was uncomfortably sexual, if you just heard the sound you would think I was watching porn for sure.
god, Bella, learn how to scrapbook! embarrassingly bad at scrapbooking.
Hmm no attacking comments at edward yet.... not yet convinced I don't think that guy's a bit attractive.
Hey instead of Bella becoming a vampire, Edward should just become a human!
I wonder if Bella and Edward were together in real life this whole time or if they recently got together.
I bet they only recently got together because it would be really hard to be attracted to someone who is that bad at acting (I'm looking at both of you guys on this one!) it would take awhile to get over that.
Edward is bad at doing an American accent. Maybe he's a good actor with his British voice on..
I love the forest it's so beautiful.
I bet there are werewolves in there who almost got re-cast on account of not being manly enough but then bulked the eff up and got to keep their roles.
Ughhhg I miss driving a truck
Haaaahaa funny nightmares with screaming because your heart is broken!
AMAZING floating Edward head in the middle of the road while you're being a bitch to your friend. Oh my god, you selfish little bugger, this is too dumb to handle.
uh oh Bella Swan's going to turn into Lindsay Lohan. That's why Lindsay is so nutso she musta got left by a vampire at some point.
Oh good, please go on and on about it and make us understand it wouldn't be weird for a girl to date a guy a year younger than her. haha "I'm not into being a cougar" you're 18 FOR GODSSAKES no one's saying you're a cougar! gah!
Mmmmmmm werewolves
Jersey shore people totally don't have crushes on vampires.
"you're apologizing for bleeding?"
haaaahahaa who hasn't been there?
"wait let me TAKE OFF MY SHIRT I HAVE ABS AND A WEAVE it will make you feel better"
"how about that new movie Face Punch? have you heard of that?"
FACE PUNCH??? FACE PUNCH.
I realize they were making a joke. Too bad, still dumb. The movie's name that they go and see cannot be "Face Punch"
uuuuuuuuuuughhhhhhh jacob is acting like every two-weeker I've had. except with muscles.
"I'm not like a car you can fix up, I'm never going to run right, it wouldn't be fair to you"
I wonder if she felt as embarrassed saying these lines as I do watching them?
uh oh it's not mono it's WEREWOLFSYNDROME
lautner is so ridiculously bad I feel embarrassed for him.
"it's not you, it's me. ME THE WEREWOLF"
why does he have to pause between every word like that?
wow werewolves are just packs of hot guys without shirts.
Bella for sure has super terrible dependence issues. GROW A LIFE, SWAN.
After a dry spell any vampire is almost good, eh bella?
so... no CGI budget, eh?
This is about as bad as the original BBC narnia movie.
I can't hear anything over your abs!
"you have no idea how tight I'm bound"
wow, you sure now how to pick 'em, eh Bella, two evil supernatural creatures?
ohhh now you love him now that he's unattainable and werewolfy
Sexy hug time!!!!!!!
HAAAA whoa that's totally the kid from renegadepress.com now he's a werewolf! I think I am the only one who finds that last sentence even remotely interesting.
who let that guy put his shirt on? new moon fail
"it's not a lifestyle choice, Bella. I was born this way I can't help it!"
ironic considering the novel was written by a mormon...
I would kill for that redheaded vampire's hairs.
this "fight" sequence is super weird and slowed down and artistic and radiohead-y. I guess girls don't like real fighting that's why.
Aw yeeeah mouthtomouth sexy shirtless times, every adolescent girl's fantasy (kidding)
Holeeeeeeeeeee Bella Swan you're so mean to that werewolf what if he loses his temper? You are sure going to lose your face.
"Bella what is that god-awful wet dog smell??"
haaa he crushed the phone with his hands because he was SO SAD
oh the two-weeker doesn't want her to leave
aw he looks like such a little kid sometimes that makes me like him despite the muscles and the terrible acting
this "film" is honestly the most terrible thing! I can't believe this got made! for millions of dollars!!!!
this would be way WAY more dramatic if he were going to burn alive in the sun instead of just sparkle brightly!
Umm Edward isn't even really in this movie, I just realized.
"because it just didn't make any sense for you to love me. I'm nothing, I'm human."
grossssss twilight you're the worst
THAT ENDING WAS BRUTAL.
Who wants to Mystery-Science-Theatre the next one with me?
Wow, well live-blogging this and doing drugs made this way more tolerable. Way to promote drug usage, Twilight.
Amazing.
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